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Thursday, May 17, 2007

May Leong

There is this lady by the name of May Leong, from Singapore. A fellow blogger at http://pinkmayflower.multiply.com/ whom many believed passed away suddenly due to overwork and stress. Her last blog entry titled “Worked Up, Stressed Up, Crashed Down” http://pinkmayflower.multiply.com/journal/item/140 was posted two days before she died …

I couldn’t sleep yesterday, I kept thinking about her last entry, if only she has listened to her body. But, sometimes, we do think we are strong, but men are weakest, and we are indeed getting weaker. For, we seldom listen.

Excerpts from May Leong’s Blog ….

“I was thrilled to finally have the chance to “fly high” in a Fortune 500 MNC. It’s ok for me to wake at 3.30am to start work @ 4.30am everyday in the morning. But never did I realise what kind of stuff were coming towards me.”

“Had diarrhea last Thu, hurt my knee and was limping badly since last Sunday, had breathlessness since Wed & fainted after work on that day at my office lift lobby, knocked my head against the wall when I fainted, collapsed again last night at home. Now my chest feels really tight & breathing is really tough. Doc just said I’m really stressed out. sigh….. what should I do? Quit? or continue this ultra-super stressful job?”

“Just yesterday, I received an email from my job agency saying that a contract staff who’s working in HP as well, passed away from heart attack, leaving his wife & kids… deja vu? coincidental? a warning sign? I dunno. I don’t wanna end up dead for the sake of dough.”

As for me, I resigned about a month ago as I can no longer stand the stress, office politics and being belittled for over 6 years, because I do not have a degree.

There is colleague S who, with a degree get to do simple things and she earns over RM6K a month … doing the simplest thing with her very simple mind. She is happy and content at the expense of others.

I have wondered once too many if I have made to right decision. Until I read May Leong’s story, I didn’t know how lucky I am. I have a blog, and I am unwell too.

I too, refused to listen to my body, not once, but twice. I am lucky to be here, to be writing this.

I landed myself in the hospital twice in Bangkok!! I still can recall my blurry vision of my first unwell episode … remember asking my colleague “Is it that foggy this time of the year or is it my contact lenses?” I had been feeling unwell for almost a week but refused to see the doctor, taking panadol and all sort of painkillers, hoping it will all just go away. I was getting chills, feverish and yet, I dragged myself to work! Until….waking up was very difficult for me. I was losing my balance, blurred vision. I tried sleeping it off but it didn’t go away. So finally, I took a taxi to the hospital. I felt so cold! Cold like ice! Dr. tested my temperature, I was burning hot (but I told him I was cold, not hot), low blood pressure and my WBC was alarming low!! I was admitted to the hospital immediately (no insurances card, very expensive hospital = more stress!) and by 9pm I was transferred to ICU due to persistent low blood pressure, fever …. I remember feeling very tired……………. I spent two nights in ICU, and another two nights in normal ward. Cost a bomb. Terribly stressed during ‘check-out’.

Second episode, it wasn’t so bad but lasted many weeks. I didn’t have blurred vision or balancing problem. It started with me, losing lots of weight in a short period time. I was happy, I thought my metabolism was finally working! Then, I started having fever. I thought it was a small matter. I continued going to work despite having high fever (you will actually read me complaining about my fever in my blog!). Dr. discovered that my WBC and platelet was low and continued dropping in number … I was hospitalized in Bangkok, then Kuala Lumpur … I think for a cumulative 8-weeks or so.

Both episodes, my so-called, very ‘concerned’ boss of 6-years never visited me. All he was interested was “When can you come back to work”. And he even has the nerve to say that “He was disappointed in me” when I failed to attend a departmental meeting while I was on medical leave. So, I felt like my six years went down the drain. No winners, only losers. I felt like a loser, my boss is a loser, so only losers.

I took a brave move, I resigned….

So to all workaholics out there, take a break. Listen to your body. Be nice to your body.

And to those bosses who likes ‘degree’ …. Go fly kite! I have seen how my ex-company went down the drain with qualified accountants! Paid darn high but never performed, bad blood!

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